Grieving Loss. Yours & Others

Two years ago, I lost my mother and my wife’s grandmother who I loved dearly within ten days of each other. The grief that I experienced was something I had never experienced in my life. Now both of these women were in poor health, and we knew it could always be any day. But it truly does not prepare you for the event when it actually takes place. Over the last few weeks, many of my friends and colleagues have lost people they loved and adored as I did my mom and grandmother-in-law. As I attend viewings/funerals and walk with these people I truly care about, I find each time my own grief arises again.

I tell you this for two reasons. First, everybody grieves differently and some people take longer to move forward than others. I truly thought I had handled my grief well and was moving on, but after a friend of mine lost his daughter, it all came rushing back again. As I stood in line waiting to share my sorrow for his loss, I was struggling to hold the tears back as I thought of my own. I guess I still have some work to do. So it is okay if you are still struggling with the weight of your sadness. But do me a favor, if you would. If your grief is so consuming and you can’t seem to function because of it, please talk to someone. You don’t need to do this on your own.

Secondly, as a Christ-follower when we see people around us die, we think of those that we love that we are not sure of their salvation. My challenge to you is to ask where they stand with God and simply ask them if they have ever committed their life to Jesus. Because of our love for them, we want them to know of what Jesus has done for them and to know if they have trusted him alone for their salvation. And as we grieve in the future when they have passed, it helps us process our grief when we know where their eternal destination is.

One final note: If you have attended a funeral over the last few weeks or months or a close friend has lost a loved one, take a moment and check in on them. Many times when there is a death, people come from all over to offer support and comfort, but in a short time after all is said and done, we all go about our lives again. I know I’m guilty of this. So reach out and let them know you are thinking about them and see how they are doing. You might be surprised how much they appreciate your kindness and comfort in their time of grief.